& this is why my papers aren't in yet: Doctors & Dentist

So today I went to the dentist, to get my check up done & figure out whether I needed my wisdom teeth to be taken out or not. I didn't even get my teeth CLEANED. I got X-Rays and a mini awkward check up I'd say. But this is the schedule for now.

1. Wednesday, April 17th, I'm getting my cavities filled. I'm so upset that I have cavities. -____-"
2. Monday, April 29th, I get my wisdom teeth taken out. Not too excited for that. I hate the fact that I will be put to sleep, because 1. I NEVER ever EVER wanted to have any kind of operation. & 2. I'm terrified of what I'm going to say o.o
3. I don't know WHEN, but I have to go to a Periodontologist which is just a fancy name for Gum Doctor. About a year ago some of my gums on my bottom tooth ripped off. Hurt like CRAZY, but it's gone & done now. The dentist wants to make sure there is nothing wrong with it though. -______-" I think I'm okay but better safe than sorry I guess...right?

Anywho. Next week, Tuesday, I'll be going to the actual doctors to get on the medical part (I guess this is medical too...but you know what I mean.) and I'm not looking forward to the shots...>.< Goodness, I feel like a guinea pig for these doctors. In the end though, serving a mission is all that matters to me (: & my Lord.  & I'll face my fears of having a (oral) surgery or getting shots to serve and bring my fellow brothers and sisters closer to God & Christ. It's all worth it.

Papers(:

So I started my papers Sunday (March 17th.) I am so BEYOND excited!!!! I finished all the online paperwork except for the insurance part. I need my daddy's help with that. But I already have my doctors appointment set up for April 16th. I'm gonna call my dentist in a little bit to set up an appointment & hopefully see if I need my wisdom teeth out. I don't really want them out >.< I don't even want to get shots. But I need to & I'm going to suck it up & pray so that I won't be crying like a little baby like how I was when I last got shots...then again I was 4. So yeah. Wish me luck with the doctors. I hope I'll be able to submit my papers by May. I'm super excited (:

My mom & I went to DSW yesterday & I found the PERFECT missionary shoes, but they were ugly. Like, REALLY ugly, but the comfort was insane. They had 2, one was an awkward gold/khaki color and the other was black & grey. Of course the black & grey didn't have my size. But the other one did. At least now I have an idea of what kind of shoes will fit & be decent (: I've been looking at other sister missionary blogs to see what they advice the best. So far, gel insoles are a must. Definitely going to invest in those. But for now, I just gotta be patient.

Anywho! If anyone actually reads my blogs, can they tell me a good photographer in Las Vegas who's LDS? I'm looking for someone who doesn't charge that much & will get me pictures quickly. I want a nicer picture of me to send off. Thank you (: 

I got a letter!! :D

I think the most exciting thing that happens to me now is checking the mail, anticipating a letter from Elder Davis (: Yesterday I checked the mail & saw an envelope that said "Elder"  and I might have slightly freaked out a little bit--squealing like a little girl, running home, dramatically throwing the rest of the mail on the counter, hopping on to the couch, opening up the letter & reading two pages (: It was pretty wonderful! I'm so happy about that (: 

Yesterday my best friend Alysen Hess started her mission papers (: We're gonna put the same available date so we can leave around the same time. At least have the "idea" of the same time leaving. I'm so excited though. I really can't control it right now. It's so insanely real how we'd be leaving. This time next year I'll be serving :D ahhhh this is perfection. 

My Best. Elder L. Stirling Davis

Prom♥

So, this is the other guy who I owe my eternal life to. He didn't even know how much he meant to me before I told him 2 months ago, through a letter, right before he left on his mission. I felt like I should have told him then, because that's when he needed to know. It was a full page letter, back & forth, with tineeey-tiny handwriting. College-ruled (; ahaha. But in all seriousness Stirling means the world to me. He's become such a huge part of my life, it's kind of insane. I never thought he'd play such a big role to me, and not only that, but his family is the sweetest. I've met his whole immediate family & I can honestly say I've never in my whole life, had such a blessing to know a family who's so kind, funny, and pure of heart. It's insane, & I love them very much.

How we met: 
You've already read this story (maybe) but I'll say it again. I just got uninvolved with a guy that wasn't good for me, I was crying on a Wednesday morning, walked into seminary late, with everyone sitting on the stands staring at me. Great. As if I wasn't already embarrassed enough. There was only 1 seat opened up, & that was next to this boy around my height, maybe an inch or two taller, with this dirty blonde hair, green eyes, sweet smile, thin body and these glasses that were legit prescription. I walked up towards him, asking him if I could sit by him. He smirked a bit & said "yes." As I sat down, I turned away from him making sure I didn't have any more tears coming down my face. I knew who he was, his name was Stirling. He was in marching band, played the clarinet, ROTC, insanely smart, and was just nice. He seemed to have had a very sincere heart. That day when seminary ended I thanked him for letting me sit by him & asked if he needed a ride--I honestly didn't expect him to say yes. I was kind of scared of him actually. He seemed so perfect. Like everything in his life was so well put together, and he had everything he's ever needed. I was intimidated by him, by his testimony, and the spirit he brought with him. Honestly, his spirit was so extremely strong it kind of made me feel uncomfortable, and almost unbearable to be around him--he said yes to the ride. I was kind of in shock, but felt happy at the same time. That's when everything really started. I found out his best friend Eric didn't show up to seminary that day for whatever reason & that's why the seat was empty. We walked into the band room, having some small talk. Before I left to class I asked if it was okay I sat next to him in seminary the following day. He said that was fine & I could sit next to him everyday if I wanted to. I'm proud to say I accepted that invitation (: 

Seussical 2012(:

And that was the beginning. Simple story about how Stirling & I actually met. We began to grow kind of close I guess you could say. October we started to hang out, I had his number & we texted sometimes. He's really helped me. From Stirling just being so great, I wanted to be better. I wanted to be worthy enough to be called his "friend," and I knew with who I use to be needed to change. So I stopped. I stopped everything that I knew what I was doing was wrong. My language, behavior, attitude, who I was at home, everything. It was noticeable too. We spent time with each other at the marching band Halloween party, hung out a few times in November. November was really something because that's when he invited me to join youth choir. I wasn't exactly sure considering I didn't know any girls who went, but I went anyways. I'm so glad I did too, because I gained my testimony there. Being involved in youth choir was probably one of the best experiences I've had in my life. & thanks to Stirling, for just inviting me to go, I gained so much from it. We ended up doing the stake musical where Eric was the main character and from that we saw each other every day. 

Graduation (:

Stirling became such an important part of my life, it was scary to think he'd leave on his mission & I wouldn't see him for 2 years. It really scared me, cause of how important he is to me. I knew I wouldn't become inactive again considering how quickly my testimony has grown & how strong it is already. But he was the first person I was actually close to that was actually going to serve a mission. Someone who I was use to being in my life. But months passed by and it was November 1st 2012 when he got his call. Elder L. Stirling Davis was called to serve in the Louisville Kentucky Mission. He would be reporting to the MTC January 23rd. A few weeks after my birthday. I made him promise me he wouldn't have his farewell on my birthday (the 6th) and he told me how great of a present that would be. I told him "Sure if you wanted to see me cry." When his MTC date kept coming closer I spent more time with him. I wanted to spend all of my time with him though--if that was even possible. We went to the temple on January 16th to do baptisms with his brother, sister & our friend Kyle. It was such a great experience, considering he was the one doing the actual baptizing. It would've been great anyways, but it was just really cool. That weekend was his farewell. 

Part of our senior seminary class (: Temple Trip
Eric, me & Stirling are on the right.  It meant a lot, it was the
first time going to the temple in 6 years. 

That Saturday I spent my night playing a game with his family for about 3 hours (just 1 round...I forget the name of the game. but it was long. thank his daddy for helping me not lose :D) Sunday they had an open house for him, his family & friends all went & that's when I actually had to say goodbye (he left to Utah to see his family before he left to the MTC.) I was suppose to be home at 5 & ended up getting home at 6. I was at his house for almost 5 hours just being silly, spending time with our friends & him, taking silly pictures (which a few might be up when I get them) and it was great. But that was probably the hardest goodbye I've ever had to do. We hugged a lot, then he opened my car door, closed it. I waved & then held up 2 fingers & he did the same. I cried for a while (actually started crying as soon as he turned around, but I knew everything would be okay,) it was really hard to say goodbye, but it wasn't really goodbye--I just now realized that. I've written him about 12 letters already (6 of them were from June 2012-January 2013 that I gave him as a part of his birthday/Christmas/going away gift.) It'll be 13 next Monday (: He wrote me back after his 1st week at the MTC & it's always such a thrill getting a letter from him (: I love Stirling with all of my heart. I love his family too, they're the best and I'm blessed to know the Davis'. His little sister is too adorable. His big brother is the funniest guy I know, and he always puts me in a better mood when I'm around him. His older sisters are so insanely sweet & kind. His mom is such a joy to be around. His dad is one of the smartest guys I know & is so legit.

Stirling is such a great example to everyone. Was an insanely perfect example to me & I'm glad I told him. I never got a chance to see his reaction when I told him, but I'm sure it meant something to him (: He keeps encouraging me on how I need to serve my mission & I cannot wait to tell him that I'll be able to start my papers Sunday :D It'll be great.

Prom day date :D He was my first official date, & he thought it was insane I've never been out on a date before him. He's seriously perfection & the PERFECT gentleman. 

My Best. Eric J. Wilson

Last picture we took together, my birthday party (:
He's legit my everything.
My best friend & the brother I've always wanted♥

This guy, changed me to become a better person, helped me gained a testimony & made me realize I was a Daughter of God. I pretty much owe him my Eternal Life. I remind him how much he's changed me all the time. I know he see's it because we've always somehow been in each others lives. Lets start from the beginning shall we?






How we first met:
Seems like it should be a pretty normal story right? Sure we met in High School, Middle School, considering he changed my life & spun me in a complete 180 degree direction right? Wrong-o!! We were in the same ward when we were little sun-beams!(: Oh, but how he was such a devil child. I think all of us girls remember when we were little how we wore those dresses that were poofy right? Yeah cause I wore those all of the time! But Eric being Eric, he didn't have any siblings at this age. Only boy. Came up behind me, and lifted up my dress to see what made it poofy. We were probably 4/5 years old. I started crying!!! What is this boy doing lifting up my dress?!?!?! I told my mom, who told his mom, & she made him apologize to me. I hated him since then. He was also that little boy in primary that was the "know-it-all" which hasn't really changed when he grew up, but I don't know if it's just cause I can tolerate him, or if it's cause it's expected of us to be "know-it-all's." Funny though because a Brother said that Eric & I were going to get married. My mom told him he was silly for thinking so, we were just kids. Chances of us getting married are highly unlikely.

Our 2nd Encounter:
So we shared the same ward, 'til I moved out of the Spanish ward when I was a beehive. I went to the English ward, attended Cram MS & Mojave HS. Switched to SRHS seminary/school. I got my schedule, attended all 8 of my classes, and my 8th period was Algebra 2. I looked up and I see this nerdy looking guy with a 1 liter water bottle. I stared at him for a long time thinking "He looks like Michael DeLuca....but I know it's not him. Where have I seen him before?" It really bothered me because I was knew I knew him from somewhere...but I didn't remember where. Why? He looked at me the whole time I looked at him, & I couldn't tell if he was trying to figure out the same thing that I was. But it never clicked where I knew him from. He had a pale/olive tone skin like mine, brown hair, these hazel kind of intriguing eyes--only thing was he had glasses that covered them most of the time. Not too tall, probably an inch taller than me or so. Thin, but not skinny. You could tell he was active. But boy did this stupid kid have a big mouth. He never knew when to shut up! It was so annoying. He was only in that class for the 1st semester, but we never talked. I always wanted to ask him if I knew him from somewhere, but never did. I think him being extremely obnoxious pushed that away from me. I just remembered I saw him walking from the seminary building, with some musical instrument case, a HUGE backpack (not kidding. you can ask him, his backpack was huge,) and the water bottle. So I knew he was Mormon. I remember the math teacher always talked about volleyballs, soccer balls, tennis balls & all of these sports equipment with him. Always the brand Wilson too. Never understood why.

The beginning of our Friendship:

That boy, is Eric wilson. & to the right of him is a
different water bottle. Yeah, he played chess too.
-cough- nerd -cough-

So senior year came. I was in SRHS's color guard in marching band. There was that kid who looked familiar. Found out his name is Eric Wilson. Now it makes sense why the teacher always talked about the sports. He played soccer since he was a kid (literally. he was 6 when he started.) He was in marching band too. So now I knew who he was, but where the heck did I see him before?? That was still a question I yet to find out.
Band camp ended. 

Boy in the white tshirt, THAT'S HIS FRO.

There was an "end-of-band-camp" party, which I saw a very cute tall blonde guy walk in with another guy who was a lot shorter than the tall kid (tall boy was 6'5/6'6.) The other boy who walked in had an afro, about my height, maybe added a couple inches cause of the hair,  but he was pretty tan. pretty blue/green eyes, and he looked like he came straight out of the 60's. He introduced the tall guy to us, his name was Martin, a foreign exchange student from Sweden. My twin friends (Megan & Alina from my old post) said hi to Stirling & we all greeted Martin. Turned out Eric & Stirling we're best friends.

Eric & Stirling. Love these pics, they capture the moment XD
& yes Stirling cut his hair...Looks attractive with that cut too.

Anyways, I went to the seminary fireside to find out which class I was in. I was in Brother Herrera's seminary class. I sat in the back row with my friend Emily. Brother Herrera mentioned how "only the best kids sat in the front row--Stirling you look good! how come no ladies are sitting next to you?" and as he asked this Eric Wilson walked up to sit next to Stirling....naturally everyone laughed. I thought to myself how I would probably never befriend them. Sure maybe become an acquaintance or something, but never anything more. 
We had Marching Band practice every Tuesday nights. I started to notice Eric a little bit more every time. Realizing he may not be as annoying as I thought he was. Either that or I was starting to get use to it. But we had a Thursday night football game one day, & I asked him "Eric. You look so familiar, do I know you from somewhere?" he had this cheeky smile and responded saying "Yeah, we were in Rainbow Vista Ward together!" I freaked out! After the game I went to my mom & told her "do you remember Eric Wilson?! He goes to Shadow Ridge!!" Turns out he moved out of the ward right before he started his freshman year. My mom said "Yeah I remember him! He was the first boy who made you cry!" --what. I didn't even remember but it's hilarious! That's where I knew him from! I hated Eric even as a little girl! I was so excited to tell him this the next day! Friday I went up to him & told him the story. He laughed & said "I don't remember that!" I said "Me neither! but it's hilarious!" 

Under the flag is Eric. I'm to the left, & Stirling on my left.
This was when I became comfortable around them.
They made me feel happy. Without even trying.

So from there Eric & I kind of started talking, not much. But a hello every once in a while. But the following week, as I mentioned in the previous blog that I was involved with a non-LDS guy and he really wasn't what I needed in the time. We ended up going our separate ways, I met Stirling through this. Yeah, I met Stirling beforehand, but I actually started to develop a friendship with him. Through my friendship with Stirling & got closer with Eric as well. They were like a package deal. So little by little, I was able to call them my friends. They didn't know my circumstances, who I use to be, what I regretted, or anything. Eric knew a little bit of who I was because of the class we shared Junior year, but that was it. But it didn't matter to me, because he was a great influence on me. Eric being who he was helped me, the way I felt the spirit around him, his testimony, his pureness. Just literally everything about this kid, changed me. I wanted to be a good influence on him too. So that was one of my main desires to change, another was Stirling. But these two guys just made me feel happy, I felt the spirit around them. We would just be sitting around in my car, on the way to school from seminary and I'd feel happy. I started changing obvious things, my dress, the way I spoke, how I acted. It was obvious. I started to feel happy. Most importantly, I gained a friend. A good friend. And as of this very moment, My Best Friend. 

My favorite picture of us. Well, there's 2. but this was
taken first. but yeah, he's my everything. 

We went to the botanical garden at the bellagio december
2012, & it was my favorite experience with him. 1 year ago
We went to see the forgotten carols and it's cool how a year
later we're closer. 

From this Eric & I have became very close. I picked him up for seminary pretty much every day. We hung out every day, talked on the phone often, told stories about our lives, he's really became the best friend I've ever had in my life. He knows everything about me. Literally, he's been there for me like nobody ever has. He has seen the best & worst of me. He knows how much he means to me, & we're the best of friends. We've obviously known each other for some time, and he came into my life the time I needed him the most. The Lord is timing, and has the most perfect timing ever. Eric was placed into my life the moment I was actually ready to change & become a better person, when I was needed to the most. I love Eric Wilson with my whole heart. Without him, I wouldn't be involved in the church, I wouldn't be happy. I wouldn't be attending the temple regularly. I wouldn't be a ward missionary. I wouldn't have a craving to become a full time missionary. I wouldn't have a true best friend. I wouldn't have a lot of things, but thankfully I found the answer to my prayer's. Someone who actually cared for once. ♥

 


He's the best. There's 1 more picture I'm hoping to find soon, of us at the forgotten carols with Stirling & Hailey (another great friend) but it'll be up soon♥

Thank you Eric for being exactly what I needed, when I needed it. I owe you everything.

Photo Credits To: Daniel Gershin, Hilda Hayden, Becca Huntsman & Me.

Who Am I? (not 24601.)

So, this is pretty much what I've decided today:
1. I'm going to Utah with one of my best friends, Alysen, so we can get missionary approved clothing (: 
2. I'm going to have a blog of my journey towards becoming a missionary, so all of my trials & little stories along the way, and anything else in between (: 

I'll start with information about me, I'm Crystal Rochelle Hayden (: Born & raised in Las Vegas, NV. Daddy is from St. Louis, MO & Mommy's from Lima, Peru (: So I got some Latino blood in my veins. Si habla Español, pero no mucho. But almost every year I spend my summers in Peru with my family & friends (: It's such a great blessing having two completely different cultures shared in my life. AND THE FOOD. ahaha. My abuelita is 99 years old! She's my favorite person I know, she's so cute & has the funniest stories. I'm heartbroken I won't be able to visit her this year ): It's too much money we don't need to spend, since I'd only be going for about a week. (Let's pray I get called to serve in the Peru Lima West mission (; haha) 

So anywho! I've been a member of the church my whole life, but I became inactive after I left my 1st ward I was apart of (Rainbow Vista Ward--Redrock Stake.) I moved to a ward where I didn't fit it, I was about 12/13 years old. So since I felt like "I didn't belong" and I didn't have a testimony I fell away for a while. My dad isn't a member, but my mom is. Sadly though, my mother felt the same way in the ward we moved to. So we slowly, but surely, stopped attending church as often as we should have. It'd be a change if I went to church more than once a month. Once I actually found friends in the ward, they were somewhat inactive like me. No testimony, just there to socialize, which isn't bad, but for me it was. Fast forward a year or two, I started High School at Mojave and attended seminary. There were probably 18 of us that were enrolled in the freshman class, 3 different high schools attending that 1 seminary. 2 of my friends went to Mojave. We just went to go. Sophomore year came, and I had a problem in seminary with the door greeter. I was friends with her daughter, & her daughter was a year younger than me (I was 16, she was 15.) Her daughter was dating a friend, and when her mother found out she blamed me calling me crude names saying I was a horrible influence on her daughter. So I stopped attending seminary, church, everything. I was done. I hated the way I was treated, so I just left. I was miserable, well, I thought I was happier, but I see now I wasn't. I finished my sophomore year at Mojave High School & ended up switching schools to Shadow Ridge High School which resulted in us moving for the 1st time (during my life at least.) We were then suppose to attend the Shadow Ridge ward--Tule Springs Stake. I had high hopes for this ward, really wishing it would be different. I went to seminary on the 1st day of school, telling the door greeter there I was a junior & just moved to the area. He went to another leader & they were deciding which seminary class I would belong to. Lets take a second here for my thoughts then "What do you mean which class...? I'm a junior. Why don't you just show me where the junior class is. Not that hard." & what I actually said was "Oh, I'm a junior...is there more than 1 school that attends this seminary?" Brother Woodruff's response (door greeter) was "No, just Shadow's. But we do have 3 junior classes." WHAT?! 3 JUNIOR SEMINARY CLASSES?! WHAT ON EARTH DO YOU MEAN? & JUST ONE SCHOOL?!?!?!? So, every class had about 20 students. I ended up having Brother Treu. I felt completely awkward & out of my comfort zone. I kept attending seminary, eventually enjoying Brother Treu, & I found out he was in the ward I was going to move into. He had 4 kids, all very young. Very sweet family, and I started to feel comfortable. I met a girl named Alina in my English class who was LDS. She then introduced me to her twin sister, Megan, who happen to be in my seminary class! I started to become friends with them & started attending seminary more regularly, also starting to attend church. Doing this, didn't exactly help my testimony though. I didn't have a desire to change. I can put it like this. I was stuck in this muck, and I was comfortable like that. I didn't want to change my ways, I didn't want to stop the sins I was committing. So I continued with who I was. I started to become involved with a guy who made me feel special & beautiful for once in my life. He wasn't LDS, but he wasn't exactly a "bad" guy either. But he didn't encourage me to continue engaging in the church, but at the same time I never expressed that I wanted him to, so he couldn't read my mind. I don't blame him. Long story short, Junior year ended, Senior began, & I didn't change a bit. Went to seminary, had Brother Herrera. He was probably the BEST seminary teacher I've ever had. But of course I didn't know that at first. (2 senior seminary classes with about 30/25 students in each) So I was in Marching Band--Color guard. I met these 2 guys, who little did I know at the time, would literally change my life, help me turn a 180, and guide me towards an eternal life. Funny thing is though that they didn't know how much they did for me at first. One did at first, but the other was just my friend. The friends I needed more than anything in the world. So anywho, it was October 2011 when the guy I got involved with & I went our separate ways. I was heartbroken, walked into seminary, & the class was sitting on the stands. I was already embarrassed cause you could tell I've been crying, I walked in late, & now the whole class was staring at me as I tried to find a seat. There was 1 open seat, I knew who this guy was but I was always intimidated by him, because of how insanely perfect he was in my eyes. You could literally see the Light Of God in his eyes. I asked if I could sit by him, he had a kind little smirk & said yes. We got our senior pictures that day, I got mine saying "Crystal Rochelle Hayden" & his name on it was "Logan S. Davis." (click on his name to read his impact on my life in detail) I was almost 100% positive his first name was Stirling though...But that was the start. His friend Eric Wilson (click on his name to read his impact on my life in detail--our story goes WAY back--surprisingly) wasn't there so that's why he had an open seat. I offered him a ride to school, since I drove & he walked to school every day. He accepted my offer, & it began from there. We started off as acquaintances, then had a friendship & it build from there. Him, Eric & I started to become friends, very good friends on that note. But from there, I gained a testimony. I knew wholeheartedly that the church I thought I was wasting time with, was 100% true. We had a loving, just, and caring Heavenly Father who has given us the opportunity to live on this beautiful earth he has created for us, while the church has been restored. We do live in the final days and need to spread the Gospel to share the happiness to others. True happiness, so they can also feel the Pure Love of Christ.

Just an picture of me, when i first met Stirling & Eric. I didn't exactly care about "modesty" because "it was Halloween & It was okay to dress like this. It wouldn't hurt anybody." but no, I didn't get this outfit. at all o.o

This was Easter Sunday After  I met Stirling & Eric (funny, Stirling & I were dating around this time...haha) and you can see the difference in just the way I take care of myself. Funny thing this gospel. Makes you love you the way you are (:

So from becoming friends with Stirling & Eric I've become strong in the church, and have made a ton of new friends who are great members (: RM's, Pre-Mish's & other active members! It's been amazing. But around September 2012 I decided I'd apply to BYU-I, and start reading the Book of Mormon. I wanted to be up in Idaho winter/spring semester, & deadline for apps were October (: I thought I'd make it, but I kept procrastinating myself with school, musical theatre, friends & church. It never really made much sense to me, but whatever, I kept doing what I was doing. I was planning on serving a mission when I became 21. It was something I wanted to strive towards more than anything. Continuing on with life I was reading the Book of Mormon, already gaining a testimony, then came October 6, 2012. The day that would literally change my life in a blink of an eye. 

October 6, 2012.

I woke up late for the Saturday morning session. I woke up in time for the closing prayer (yeah, pretty guilty....sorry, but my mom slept in too!!!) and I heard they were building a new Temple in Arequipa, Peru--which as you know, I'm Peruvian. It meant a lot to me & I was super excited because that's where my Abuelita was from! So my best friend Eric calls me about 5 minutes after the prayer. He sounded super excited & asked "Did you hear the news?! Did you?!" & I'm all excited now too! I said "Yeah!! They're building a Temple in Arequipa!!" and he said "No...the missionary age..." And I just felt the Spirit overcome me at that moment. I asked him "What happened...?" I heard a smile in his voice as he said "They lowered it! Boys can go at 18 now & women at 19." and in that very moment, I started bawling. not just little tears, NO. I was literally sobbing my eyes out because I knew in that very moment, that I was meant to serve. I didn't apply to Idaho, I had the need to finish the Book of Mormon, I had an appointment with my Bishop about some personal matters. Everything just clicked & I knew that I was meant to serve a mission. Eric & I talked a bit more, then I hung up. I walked into my mom's bedroom again, she was on the phone with her sister and I'm just a crying mess. She told her sister to stop talking & asked me what's wrong, and I said "Nothing, everything's perfect" between sobs. She kept asking me if I was okay & I kept responding "Perfect!! I'm so perfect right now!" Once I finally controlled my tears I told her they lowered the missionary age & just cried out "I'm going mom. I'm going to serve a mission. I'm going to serve a mission." She smiled & started tearing up, hugged me & told me how proud of me she was. I kept crying, she talked on the phone with her sister, & I cried for about an hour...maybe more. I cried throughout the day because I've never been so sure of anything in my life. Ever. It's just something I'm meant to do. 

I fixed my life, and had things put back together and I was happy. I had my testimony, I wanted to serve. I was ready.

This Sunday I'll be starting my papers to serve a LDS mission. I can honestly say I've never been so excited to do ANYTHING in my life. It'll definitely be the hardest thing for me to do, leave my family, my home & my friends, but it'll be the greatest blessing in my life, and my family's lives, and the fellow members I will have a chance to convert, along with their future families & ancestors. 

I'm so extremely blessed to have a mother & father who are 100% supportive of me going on a mission. My dad, who I mentioned before--wasn't LDS, is excited for me & is encouraging me to go. He's always been such a great man I look up to in my life, who I know loves me & my mom more than anything. He wants us to go to church, he woke me up & dragged me to seminary even when I didn't want to go, and now encourages me whenever I have a fireside to go to, FHE, institute, a ward missionary meeting, or a meeting with my bishop or stake president. I pray that my serving a mission could open his heart to hear the gospel, feel the spirit, realize that this is the true church and that one day he will be able to be a priesthood holder, be there when I enter the temple with my eternal companion. And what I pray for the most, is that we can become an eternal family.

So this is the story of me, & pretty much how my strange life has led me to the person who I am today--a future sister missionary. I'm so excited, as I said earlier, but I literally cannot wait to go & serve (: If i had to be at the MTC next Wednesday, I'd go.

My testimony is short, but it's meaningful. I know that I am a child of God, I know that the Book of Mormon is a true scripture, I know that Joseph Smith is a true prophet of God, as well as all of the other Prophet's called unto our church. I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is true. I know we will return home to our loving Heavenly Father & Savior Jesus Christ, I know that we will have Eternal life, and I know that everyone who has walked this earth, who is walking this earth, and everyone who will walk this earth, will have a chance to hear about the Gospel.